Fred Allen's Quotes

Fred Allen's Quotes 15

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.

Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a...

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All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.

I learned law so well the day I graduated I sued the college won the case...

I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find...

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The first time I sang in the church choir two hundred people changed their...

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

I like long walks especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God...

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I don't have to look up my family tree because I know that I'm the sap.

Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go...

My father never raised his hand to any one of his children except in...

An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian...